Micheal Pinto – The King of Good Bodies
It had been on my mind to meet The owner of Micheal Pinto.They are the coffinmakers cum arrangers for dead bodies of the Christians.I don’t know the exact word to use, so I am sorry if I have used the wrong phrase.Today I had some work at Bandra, and I passed Mahim and told the Taxi chap to stop , and I took my chance to meet the great man himself.
I met the son instead, Dion Pinto, as Danny Pinto the father was not around.I introduced myself and told him I want to write an article on them, and when he asked which newspaper, I told him it is for a we site called Sulekha.He said he knows very well about it, and sometimes reads it.I have requested him to join Sulekha, and he has promised me he will.What he told me fastcinated me.
They are open day and night.They have 5 branches all over Mumbai.And each branch has 3 to 4 Hearses.
They had a dozen coffins ready.Coffin costs like 1500 to 15000.The bodies ,if male are shaved, make up put, and bathed and dressed in the best of the suits of the deceased, with a tie.Jeans are not allowed on the dead body, body has to be dressed Formal.
The burial grounds allow you just a year and a half to 2 years maximum and then u have to take away the bones.Rent is like 2000 a year or so.(Well everything costs money).They put salt etc so that the body decomposes faster.
After a year and ah alf, the bones are collected by them and the family members who too are present, so that they don’t dig the wrong grave and give someone else’s bones.The bones are then taken to the church, and kept in a ‘niche’ as they call it, a small place on the wall.That too costs some money.
Nowadays most Christians take the coffin to the electric Crematorium, and burn the body , and the ashes brought to the church.The Christians celebrate the dead, not mourn like us.And the richer ones hold a party of wine and food for the dear and near ones.
Prominent Deaths = Danny Pinto has done for Pramod Mahajan, taking the body from Hinduja hospital to KEM for Post Mortem and then to the crematorium.
Mother Teresa – Danny was called to Calcutta for her death, and he did the embalming and everything for her.
ONGC – They had a rig blow up some time back, and they did all the bodies ,which were charred and collected from the sea.
Charity Work – During the Train Blasts of Mumbai two years ago, they sent all their dozen odd Hearses to the accident sites and shifted the dead and theinjured to hospitals.
And for poor Christians its free or very subsidized.
Their Famous Slogans – All this is the brain child of Danny.Here are some samples
1) Everyone Dies for Our Service
2) Last Stop Shop
3) Dead Centre of Town ( This is outside their Shop, the pic I will post later)
Competition – Yes even in this trade there is competition.Literally Cut Throat .So they are open 24 x 7.The whole family is involved in this trade.Danny looks after the finances and billing, Dion for the local work, and Dion’s mother of overseas bodies, and outstation bodies too.
Dion and I got very friendly, and he offered me a nice cup of tea, and told me meet my Dad , he will love a humourous guy like u, and give u more details, as I have joined just a few years back.
Dion said people often ask us if u are not afraid of the spirts of the dead, who may comeback to haunt you.He said, and u can write Kamalji, that We are more scared of the living , than the dead.The Living ones cause us more harm, buy bargaining, somethings cutting our money from the Bills.The dead are so cooperative literally.
Most probably I will meet Danny tomorrow, and I think he will make a very interesting blog , with loads of information, and fun.Dion said he is very funny, and when he is free he thinks all these funny one liners, which are a trademark in humour in themselves.Sample this
When u drop Dead , Drop In
We are the last persons to let u lie in peace.
Mr.Danny, after we meet I promise u one thing, neither will I ever forget u, but then again, neither will u forget me.Till we meet.
KAMAL MAHTANI
Close
hitting the nail in the coffin' what a business to be in," business starts when people die",in our trade we die when business starts",
i remember my dad asking hows business? turnover? imagine danny must be telling his father its raining people,in a city like mumbai,these guys must be making a killing,if i was young maybe i would start this business
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Dear Ojantric,
Man ur sense of humour is amazing, and u are very witty.Lets see u come out with some good funny blogs.Send me a note when u blog.Vote or no vote, yr visit is a pleaure.Thanks.Kamal
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I have already read your interview with Danny. So, this is a belated remark. Though I read Danny Pinto first, I must say, this one sounds equally good. And yes, I will keep dropping in here at your blog, though I haven't dropped dead yet. Or so I think.
For some reason I can't figure out, Sulekha is not allowing me to recommend/vote. I would have voted otherwise for your posts. I wrote to Sulekha Support, but they have decided not to support. They are as silent as Danny Pinto's cooperative clients.
Perhaps we should order a coffin for them.
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Dear Santosh,
I told yr one liners to Danny, and he was laughing away.He said give me Santosh's number and next time he wants a one liner he will get it ready from u.
Man what a brain u have.Ingenious.loved all of them.HAHA.Regards.kamal
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Dear Sampathji,
You are dead right.Regards.kamal
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Dear Swarajyaji,
Great that u are having a nice time.I am having a nice time too, with the rains too,appos, good fishes, which mom buys, i dont.Will meet keshav soon, rest allfine this side.Take care.Regards.kamal
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Kamalji
The less you shake the more we make
Only you will have the curiosity to interview Michael Pinto ! Great one yaar. There is a TV show in US called Six Feet Under about a family who runs a funeral parlor. Great show. Watch it sometime
I was thinking of one liners and thot of this
1) When you pass away we will never fail you
2) Even if you pass away you can never pass us by
3) You are dead right ! We love you Dead or Alive (even better dead)
4) Better Dead than Red ! (communist)
5)The Worst of times (for you) are the Best of times (for us)
6)We love old people (the older you are, the more we love you)
7) When you go under we start over
9)We like the strong silent type
10) Doctors like Arthritis but we like Rigormortis
11) We like hard bodies
12) You may like ure partner hot but we like them cold, stone cold
Santosh
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dear
kamaljhi,
deadly
blog
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My dear Kamalji,
I am encouraged by your compliments.Please allow me to enjoy with my comments.I am in Atlanta,Georgia.The summer has just started but still pleasant.Hope you are having a nice time at Mumbai.Did you meet SUMBA mambers?Please give my salaam to Keshav Bhai.Hope you must be going to fish market daily for buying fish.
Swarajya
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Dear Ranjiniji,
Yes when we cannot recognize the living sometimes how can we the dead ? thisis a noble profesion, and tomm i have the appointment with the father Danny, and i want toask him about the famouspersonalities that he has dealth weith.should be fun even this gory topic.
Regards.kamal
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